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Hello everyone!! It’s been a long time I didn’t write anything in my blog. In the end of this year, I want to tell you my 2020 experience which is for me, is most of typhoon year in 22 years of my life.

In March 2020, I was diagnosed by the doctor A that I have several injured in my spine. But the doctor A didn’t explain very clearly what kind of injured it is. So me, my parents and people I love didn’t know what’s going on with me.

2 months pass and following doctor A medical prescription, I still can’t walk. So my parents decided that I should take a acupuncture treatment. After 3 months being acupuncture with duration 3 times a week well, I have a a improvement, I can walk to the restroom or bathroom on my own. But, the improvement is very small. From that I realize that doctor A trick me by not tell me, my family and beloved ones what is truly going on with me so I can do a doctor A appointment continuously.

Also in that month, I still struggling to finished my internship report. Yes, I worked my report on my bed and I didn’t tell my teacher about my condition on purpose because the unclear diagnosed and ineffective treatment by doctor A also that time COVID-19 tyrannized everywhere in the world, including our country. So, I didn’t want to worry him with my unclear physical conditions.

Finally, with 30% stamina on June I finished my internship report and get worthy of trial / defense. But my journey wasn’t end yet, I still need to finished my final assignment, the Bachelor Research Essay. At that time, I though I have 95% of my work done, but apparently wasn’t. So, I need to do more development on my research with only 5% of stamina and apparently decreased day by day.

Next July, I decided to join a training which can help me develop my research deeply and decided that after that I need to find a good doctor who can explain more clear and sharp about my conditions. My violin teacher recommend me to see doctor X. Doctor X have a good reputation about spine and traumatology. I went to see him on August and after saw my CT-Scan and X-Ray, I being diagnosed HNP (Hernia Nukleus Pulposus) or you can say a Slipped Disc. Usually people with HNP recommend by the doctor to do a surgery. But, I insist not. Because, there was very high risk of complication which means, very high risk of death. Even though I’m a risk taker, sometimes with a rational fact, good informations and expert opinions, you should be a risk averse, specially in life and death situations.

In the middle of August, my teacher asked me about my Bachelor Research Essay. So, I told him about my physical conditions and he extend my deadline.

On September, my physical conditions have a 50% improvement and I know that’s not enough to do my Bachelor Research Essay defense well. But I very surprised when the chairman of the board of examiners tell my scores. At that time I could not hold myself and hurry up want to end the meeting because I cry and scream loudly in my room.

That last September I decided to challenge myself by decided to take a competency certification in the next December as long with training and international conference in a row. For whole November I focused study the certification exam materials.

Then the month I been waiting for, December.

On 1-3 December I participated in a training to prepared the certification exam followed by international conference on 7-10 December. The exam or assessment being held on 11 December. It’s time for me to test my stamina by participating in seminars, training, international conferences and exam. At the second day of risk international conference, I passed out in my table (I didn’t tell my parents because they will scared).

Then, 3 days ago I informed that I passed the exam and able to hold my competency certification degree.

This years was the worst year of my life but also a reflection for me. Because of this year, I can see a person who truly loved, care about me and the one who only want to used me or gossiping abut me. My parents, my violin teacher and all my orchestra members is very special to me. When they hear that I passed out on my desk (informed by my mom). They called me immediately to know what am I doing. Also, they knew that’s something wrong with me even though I hide it well with my poker face or smile. From that moment, I decided to focusing on people who truly loved and care about me from their actions and communication to me and threw away people who want to use and mocking me.

Thank You 2020, you do it so well!